Oops, Man City fans should be embarrassed

First of all, congratulations to Manchester City.

Second point, get some fans with a little class. You're really going to put up a banner with Britney Spears song title on it? You should be deducted points for being bell-ends.

There are plenty of fans that sing songs by rather dubious artists - and various incarnations of Winter Wonderland, Guantanemera, Can't Take My Eyes Off of You etc., but i don't recall any fans bringing professionally made signs to a ground promoting their knowledge of a teen pop star who later became famous for flashing her bald parts - head and tails if you know what I mean.

I don't mind seeing kids cry when their team get relegated, or grown men jumping up and down when they win the league, but seeing a 60 year-old slide on his knees and kiss the pitch after beating West Ham 2-0 at home is a little over the top.

Congrats again to the City players, but if you win it again next year, tell your fans to act like they've been there before. Or Hit Me Baby One More Time and out me out of my misery of watching you celebrate.

English Football Didn’t Start in 1992

History is a good thing, but it's just that, history

Manchester City haven't always been as fashionable as they are now.

Hi. My names's Ash.
"Hi Ash!"
And, um...
"It's okay, we're all friends here, take your time."

Thanks. I'm, um, a football supporter and I, uh... [clears throat] I don't... I don't support a team in the Premier League.

A hush descends on the room, there are a few quizzical looks, a couple of sad nods and shakes of the head and even one quiet but audible gasp.

Yes, friends, this is what it often feels like to support a "lower" league team. You are an aberration. You're fooling yourself, You must have a Prem team, you simply must! How do you even live?!

It's hard not to hate football almost as much as I love it because of precisely this kind of fandom.

Like Sloan once sang, "It's not the band I hate, it's their fans."

Don't get me wrong, I'm happy to watch all kinds of football. I'd be lying if I didn't say I appreciate and often enjoy a hard fought game in the top tier or the You-don't-have-to-be-Champions League. But it's the superiority complex of many fans, the attitude that my opinion cannot count because I don't support a 'proper' team. Because I don't deck myself out in every possible combination of club clothing at any given moment. Because the team I support had the temerity to have their heyday before the Premier League juggernaut really got going. (Often conveniently ignoring the fact that that applies to their team too). Because I happen to think that, in comparison to truly world class players, objectively, your star player and man-crush isn't that good and it's not because the national team manager is "playing them out of position." Because it can't possibly be that without the absurdly talented (and equally absurdly expensive) foreign import there to make your hero look good, he frequently fails on the biggest stage. Because at some point, the World Cup - the biggest stage - became overshadowed by club football.

And because I've never stopped supporting the team I grew up following; from dizzying never-again-attainable-heights and mind-numbing, soul-scarring lows. Instead, presumably, of keeping half an eye on them and hitching my wagon to the latest crop of fancy-dan, stepover merchants. Convincing myself that the Man Citys and Uniteds of this world are and have always been 'our' rivals, instead of the Countys and Albions.

The thing is, rightly or wrongly, I think your opinions are just as suspect for precisely the same reasons.
As I've mentioned, football did not start in 1992. Many clubs had success before this time, some of that number have had some since.

But the lopsided way some fans harp on about history is often perplexing. It's no good glorying in the exploits of Wolves or Forest or Leeds. The majority of their success came pre-Premier League and they're not a part of it now. An important distinction from, say, Liverpool who've had some success since the League's foundation but who would have seen winning the Football League Cup as the least of their achievements 25-30 years ago.

I'm not usually one for anecdotal evidence, but bear with me just this once. I was lucky enough to live in Nottingham in 1979/80. Most of the kids I went to school with followed Liverpool. You'd think it impossible that a club with so much history and success, not to mention  unbridled enthusiasm from the media would have fans that genuinely feel they are somehow underdogs and that the football establishment is out to get them but, they're out there, I've met some of them. Like I said, it's very hard not to hate football sometimes. Having history is often a good thing but it's just that, history. For all the success and trophies, it can often be a millstone around supporters necks. They struggle to reconcile with the mediocrity (or worse) of the present and so the club can never realign itself to the new football reality and be as good as they remember it.
That reality for the vast majority of clubs is either find a very rich owner with no desire to make money from the club but still happy to throw vast sums at it or be content with mid-table obscurity and the occasional tilt at a domestic trophy.

Success or failure can often be relative but year-in, year-out, fans of "unfashionable" clubs get bombarded with hyperbole about how terrible it was that a 'big' club missed out on Europe. It's hardly comparable with relegation or administration but you'd think they were cakewalks compared to missing out on all that
m̶o̶n̶e̶y quality football.

And the 'big' club moniker is bandied around in ever more perplexing ways. There's no solid definition. Amount of fans? Trophies? Richest owners? Man City have three stars on their crest because it looks more 'continental', not because of European success. Forget Wolves or Leeds or even Forest being considered big clubs, the new football hierarchy would exclude old giants like Ajax and Celtic.

I think a lot of the blame, if that's the right word, can be partially attributed to the creation of the Premier League and most to the media. Now armchair fans across the globe are not only treated to seeing their team every time they play but are also bombarded with facts and figures and hyperbole that strains credulity and makes a run-of-the-mill wet Wednesday night mid-table clash seem like the World Cup Final. It's no wonder there's no sense of proportion. And then we all get to do it again next week.

I can genuinely remember a time when fans would get behind any English club that got into Europe. Not hardcore support or changing allegiances but just hoping for a good show from one of our own. The football landscape has changed so irrevocably that i find myself actively wishing for some 'home' clubs to be knocked out just to get their fans and the media to shut up for a bit.

It's because of this constant coverage, the belief that certain teams are untouchable or the evergreen 'to good to go down' (tell that to Rangers, Pompey, Leeds, Charlton, etc.) that nothing matters as much, that history is only relevant when it's your club, that records only count post-1992 or since the creation if the Champions League, that spending incredible amounts of money on fair-to-middling players is somehow acceptable, that getting into the top four is an achievement on par with winning... anything at all.

It's because of these things that I'll watch top flight football but I'm sometimes glad the team I follow isn't a part of it.

"But the skill, the showmanship, you don't see that in the lower leagues."
You mean showboating? [clears throat]

"Well I bet you don't see goals as good."
I'll take that bet.

"It can't be exciting with nothing to play for."
Wrong and wrong.

-Ash Hawthorne

(Ash is a guest writer for the Geezer; he is the author of the Miserable Batsteward blog and you can follow him @VieuxPoissons.)

Are West Ham fans right to boo their own team?

Sam Allardyce was confused that West Ham fans booed despite a 2-1 win over Hull City that should mean the Hammers stay in the Premier League another year, but should he be that surprised that the fans vented their anger?

No. (That's the simple answer).

And here's why...

Yes, fans pay a lot of money to see the game and want to be entertained. No one really wants to be entertained if their team still loses, but we're willing to accept this every now and then. But ultimately they want to see passion, effort and progress.

West Ham fans have seen none of that this year. Allardyce blamed injuries and suspensions at the start of the season, and to some extent he was proved right when he won Manager of the Month for February after 4 straight wins. But even in those 4 wins, West Ham have played some terrible football all season and really look like they have no idea how to break a team down.

Banging long balls to Andy Carroll or Carlton Cole and hoping Kevin Nolan gets the scraps isn't what West Ham fans want to see - and no it's nothing to do with the Academy, Bobby Moore and winning the World Cup - it's not what any fan wants to see. A full back smashing the ball upfield to a target man is an option if you're trying to mix it up, but it shouldn't be the first option.

West Ham have wingers who can't beat a man and get to the byline, which means they just lump balls into the box when they get a chance hoping for a second chance opportunity. James Collins, James Tomkins and Winston Reid can defend, they just have no idea what to do with the ball when they get it, hence more long straight balls.

And this is why fans boo the team, and especially Allardyce. He recruits players that can only really play this way. He hasn't improved the team he set up to get back into the Premier League. When Ravel Morrison looked like he may provide some spark of creativity, he was shipped off to QPR. Youth team players have no chance under Allardyce as he seems to just bothered about staying up, not improving.

And I think that's why he gets booed. No one wants to just stay up playing the way Allardyce wants West Ham (and Bolton and Newcastle before that) to play.

They want to see exciting players, good football and passion. None of these were evident last night (or any night for the last few seasons) as they struggled to beat 10-man Hull, who frankly deserved all 3 points.

Yes, West Ham should be in the Premier League next year, but unless Big Sam can convince the owners he is making progress they may have a new manager.

Monday night football - Good or Bad? Discuss...

It's hard to argue that Manchester City v Chelsea is the game of the weekend. Well, you could argue that it's not actually at the weekend.

We have to wait until Monday night for the clash, which won't decide the title, but could give one team a huge psychological advantage - especially if Chelsea manage to win.

But should these games be delayed until the Monday so that everyone can watch them on TV? It's great for the neutral after a boring day at work, and even better for those in the US who get to break up the work day for 90 minutes, but fans going to the game can't be happy.

The atmosphere at night games is usually really good, but travelling to Manchester from London on a Monday probably means taking a day off work, getting home at 2am on the Tuesday, feeling rough after a few beers on the train back. And it's all fine if you've won, or seen a great game. But then there's Sunderland v West Ham getting moved to a Monday night. That's a monster journey to watch an average game - Sunderland fans rarely even fill half the stadium on a Saturday afternoon.

But realistically, the Premier League is a TV league now. The execs don't care about the fans who go to the games, just the ones who are on the sofa, or in a bar. Ticket prices are ridiculous, match day times are constantly shifting and soon enough we'll be having time-outs for adverts.

Yes, the best games are becoming easier to watch for everyone, but the league needs to remember the actual match-day experience. Because a game with no fans in attendance is a real possibility one day - and once the atmosphere goes, so does the Premier League.

We are all Liverpool fans again

I’m a Liverpool fan. Again. Why? Because we’re  a couple of goals allowed from the top of the table. I know what you’re thinking. I’m a sunshine boy.  A fair-weather fan.  I only watch when we’re winning, and I only sing when they print the words to the songs on a karaoke feed.  Well, you’re right. And you wish you were one, too. Admit it.  That way, instead of spending the last 25 years hoping, in vain, that Everton would return to their Andy heyday or pretending that Aston Villa had never Peter Withered, you could have been sneakily watching Manchester United or Arsenal play some decent football.

Why is it considered such a footballing sin to pick winners?

Would thousands follow Novak Djokovic down to Court #25 if he put in five rubbish seasons in a row?  Do golf fans studiously avoid Rory McIlroy so they don’t miss a shot from onetime great Bernhard Langer in the group ahead?

I first became a Liverpool fan around 1982. I was conflicted from the start; my cousin Phil made me renounce QPR, who my Dad and I had picked out of the league table at random.

I was just in time for the first reign of Ian Rush. I wasn’t allowed watch telly on Saturday afternoons so I mostly experienced the exploits of Mustacheses II through my classmates’ postgame bragging.  Rush was so great that for years I thought strikers were shit if they only scored once a game. The only time I watched the Reds play before Kenny Dalglish took over as scowler-in-chief was the 1984 European Cup Final against Roma.  This game taught me the turgidity law: the more you look forward to a match, the more boring it usually is.

Mid Dalglish was my Liverpool period.  My mum relaxed the Saturday rule between 1987 and 1989, and I gradually fell for Bruce Grobelaar, Peter Beardsley, John Barnes, Craig Johnston, John Aldridge (Mustacheses III), Kenny Dalglish (with his hybrid player-manager tracksuit-overcoat, always ready to Special Guest Star in a game, and still useful at 5 mph) and, yes, even Gary Ablett.  For a couple of years, I understood why the word fan was short for fanatic.  I loved this team, and I deluded myself that they were reciprocating this love by beating almost everyone twice a year. These were the years when Liverpool fans felt unlucky to narrowly miss out on League-Cup doubles.

It felt like the beginning of a thousand-year Reich. My classmates talked about the team missing Rush, but, as far as I was concerned, Aldridge was just as good – from his mustache down to his first touch. Of course, I made this judgement without seeing Rush play. But Aldridge could score at will.  He could never reprise his Liverpool form for Ireland, but have you ever seen the clip where the linesman stalled him on the sidelines while Jackie Charlton was trying to throw him on as a sub during a group game against Mexico at the 94 World Cup?   Aldo, one of the world’s most unflappable players, got into a flap. When he finally got on the field, I knew he was going to score. Sure enough, he sprinted up field a few moments later and almost headered the ball through the net.  He could score at will.
I felt somewhat conflicted when Rush returned to take back the mustachioed striker role. But I kept faith with my team.  

Until that team disappeared. In ’91, Dalglish quit, and Graeme Souness took over.  Souness’s first act was to sack half of my favourite players. Liverpool clearly didn’t love me any more.
The only thing Souness, Moustacheses I, had in common with Dalglish was being an ex-great Liverpool and Scotland international player from Glasgow. OK, that’s a fair amount. But Souness was the Drago to Dalglish’s Rocky. The man was a brute. Anyone who saw the legbreaking tackle he committed for Rangers as I did (on Saint and Greavesie, where sunshine fans went to get their 30 minutes of football a week) could never love Souness.  Halfway through that season, Liverpool and I broke up.

For a couple of years, I was a closet Blackburn fan.  In three years, Shearer and Dalglish took them from 19^th in the second division to premiership champions.  Nobody’s done it since.

Then I thought I’d go the Sleeping Giant route. Sleeping Giant fandom is more romantic than Sunshine Boy fandom.  Some football fans believe there is more honour in supporting their team when it’s shit. I spoke to a Boca Juniors fan once who scoffed at the league-leading season the club was enjoying. ”Two years ago, we lost every single league game at home. Every. Single. Game. And it was packed. Every week. And everyone sang, at the top of their voices. That’s Boca,” he said, sounding like a doting father.

I chose Wolverhampton Wanderers, the Wolves. They had a great chant (“We are Wolves, We are Wolves, We are Wolves” repeat x infinity, really fast); a great striker (Steve Bull, who could score hat tricks at will), and, most importantly, an illustrious history (they had won just as many league-cup doubles as Liverpool, and more than Man United at the time). 

But the Giant Wolves never really woke up. They were always tipped for promotion into the premiership, but very seldom made it. Even when they did make it, they immediately ruled themselves out of contention and started flirting with relegation.  They never even had a cup run to speak of.  Non-league Stevenage had cup runs to speak of.  Plus, pre-Internet, to find out what Wolves were doing took a lot of work. I told people I followed Wolves but then couldn’t name any of their players. It was embarrassing for both of us. Our relationship was going nowhere.

I spent several years unattached, just following games that I thought would be decent.  I was happy.
I signed on as a Liverpool fan again for a day in 2005.  One of the other Geezer contributors and I watched the European Cup final at a mate’s house. We almost switched the channel at half time, but after Liverpool got their first one back, I had the same feeling about Stevie G as I had once had about Aldridge in that Mexico game. Milan had been too cocky, and Gerrard was up for it.  Only the greats can carry a big game on their shoulders like that.  

You see it in games on the green in the housing estate, where one player just pushes their quality to a higher plane than everyone else  on the field. You seldom see it in a professional game and never in a big final. Pity Gerrard gets shirty about not getting his Phil Collins requests played, and apparently once chanted his own name like a scouse cuckoo…but you have to separate the artist from their art.
Luis Suarez seems to be that kind of great.  The much hyped “double threat” of him and Sturridge seems to be living up to the hype. And Brendan Rodgers seems to genuinely want a bit of style.  

I’m falling in love with Liverpool again. But if they start wasting leads against West Brom and fecking around in fifth place again, it’s off.

-Rob Curran

Sportsmanship ...have we gone too far?

Yeovil let Birmingham score last night, allowing Lee Novak to walk the ball half the length of the pitch and put the ball in the back of the net with no challenges, and no gaolkeeper. All this because Yeovil's Byron Webster had equalized at 2-2, chipping the Brummie keeper who had put the ball out so one of his defenders could get treatment.

Here's the BBC match report and you can see the video of the goal here.

Yeah, lovely, let a team equalize, karma, polite, good manners and all that, but sportsmanship has gone too far?

If the Birmingham keeper kicks it out, why should his team get it back? If it's a genuine injury, the referee should stop the game. If it looks serious, sure, go ahead and kick it out if the ref hasn't stopped it, but putting the ball out every two minutes has become a joke. Teams do it to waste time at the end of a game, or to get extra time for fake injuries if they are losing.

Yes, players should look out for each other and be concerned about an injury, but it's gone too far. It changes games, relieves pressure, infuriates fans and makes it harder to determine when there's a real injury.

Oh, the game would eventually end 3-3, and Birmingham would go on to win on penalties. If you care.

Soccer fans are the best in the world

So you're 2-0 up at home, then find yourself 3-2 down with less than 5 minutes to go. Do you do what Miami Heat 'fans' did when they left early when their team were in the Finals? (check out these idiots here)

Or do you stick by your team, equalize, then grab an injury time winner?

Thanks to Dax McCarty of the New York Red Bulls for posting this video.

Shows the passion of real fans - and that's why football fans are the best in the world.