He's probably better than you

There's always one player you see in the pre-match warm up having a cigarette and a can of Stella - you hope they are marking you, as you're shattered from the night before and jealous that you're not downing that can of Stella.

But then they're always better than you think, especially the fat goalies! You think it'll be easy to notch a goal or two, but he's like a skinny Neville Southall with the vocabulary of an unmedicated Tim Howard.

Got to love Sunday morning football.